Kami

Lesson in Eating Out.

jessicareed:

Most of you go out to eat on a regular basis. Maybe not as often as you once did, but you still do it, and hopefully you’ll be able to do it more often soon. I think that now is a good as time as any to sit down and get learned in some of the basic restaurant etiquette.
Now, class, let’s start from the very beginning.  You walk in the door, and you are greeted by the hostess, who sometimes (all of the time) opens the door for you. The proper response to the door swing would be to respond to whatever the hostess says to you, or a “thank you” if you must. An improper response would be anything along the lines of “Is this your JOB?!” or “WHAT I’M THE GUY, I SHOULD BE GETTING THE DOOR FOR YOU LOLOLOLOL.” Those responses are not funny, or original.
Alright, so you’re in the door. This part the same for any sit-down restaurant, ever in existence. The hostess or host will ask you one question. You’ll get asked this every time. It’s the same question. Every time. If you, for whatever reason, don’t hear the host, don’t say “what?” You know what we asked.
Now that we have that settled, we are on our way to your seat. That’s right. YOUR seat. It’s for you. We picked it out, just for you. It has your name on it. There’s a reason we are taking you there, so unless you have some sort of medical condition that prevents you from sitting on a chair, sit there. I don’t care how much you like booths better. Sure, they’re more comfortable, but chairs aren’t that bad. And trust me, it’s a hell of a lot better than sitting there waiting for your server to take that table of 20’s order. And if you ask for somewhere “more private” or “next to a window” go ahead and turn around and go back home. Because that’s more private and I’ll bet you’ve even got a window or two. Also: There are things called “Family Restaurants” They typically have things like kids menu’s, crayons, game rooms, and mascots. These restaurants are geared towards kids, and they usually have an abundance of them at any given time. If you really have the balls to go into one of these restaurants (and it’s obvious, don’t get me wrong), and ask to be seated “away from kids” you really should think about committing physical harm. To yourself.

That’s all for now.

I once wrote a blog like this about working in a cinema, and decided not to post it for fear of sounding like a douchebag.

I wish I’d saved it because I now see the error of my ways. Apparnetly, I’m not the only who has to deal with morons.